make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
How's work?
Spinning.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
