I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize