Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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