Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I am mentally ready for anal.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
