we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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