he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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