i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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