i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
