1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize
