I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
