Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
