I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
