So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
