Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
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