Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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