I swear she didn't look like that last week.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize