You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
