sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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