the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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