i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
she pinky promised me she was 18
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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