My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
