How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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