I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
