I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
