your room smells of hookers.
And success
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
