i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
