Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
