32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
