It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
