i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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