I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
So here I am, sexting at work.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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