i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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