Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
