Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
