All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
