you would pick up someone in the library
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
