dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
