i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Be still, my beating vagina.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
