I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize