Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
