i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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