i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize