Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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