She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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