i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
