i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
