Buhtt sex?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
