fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
