I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
