Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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