I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
